Be the change you want to see in the world...

joi, 20 ianuarie 2011

Forgive many things in others...nothing in yourself


Forgiveness is a funny thing...people have all kind of sweet ways to define it...some believe that is forgiveness which impedes that a "something" lost and then found to be lost again, some see it as a child's dream of a miracle by which what is broken is made whole again....sounds so nice, but sometimes it's just so hard to find...too hard!I'm a forgiving type of person, yeah, I'm nice like that :D...I believe in redemption as much as I believe in sins...cause there's a fact that sins are like little friends who live among us waiting to stab us in the back...I forgave people with all my heart and I'm glad cause it makes me feel so free...NOW, someone tell me how do I get to forgive myself for my own sins...huh!That';s the hardest thing to do..."Forgive me dear for I have sinned" doesn't seem to work....neither does "What's done is done, there's nothing left to do"...a part of me, the very stubborn type cannot let go completely...cannot begin to understand some things as long as those things remain hidden in the past...Then again, bringing them into the light may put me in the same damn rollercoaster all over again...and here I stand again, same damn crossroads,same damn difficult decisions to make...I think I'm going to continue to beg for some more forgiveness, maybe some day I'll be good enough to forgive...myself!Cause I don't have the guts nor the heart to destroy perfect harmony of those around me in order to find myself an alibi for my sins....So, that's it, I'm the worst of the worst, I'm a badass, I'm a bitch...one with a lot of mistakes and secrets by the way....time will probably erase them eventualy so...let's hope for the best.My wish again is for everybody to find true hapiness...enjoy new beginnings, false true friends, and a beautiful sunrise every day ...and maybe one day we'll stare at the same sun together...or maybe not....

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